Monday 7 November 2016

Trust

Learning to listen to trust my voice.

For the majority of my life I've been told I'm doing it wrong (it being any number of things) by lots of different people who think they know me better than I know myself. It's frustrating, exhausting and makes me constantly second guess and doubt myself. I grew up thinking I was wrong and defective- it was so detrimental and soul destroying. This is something I've been thinking about for awhile and remembering all the things I've been told I'm doing wrong throughout my life by different people. It is hurtful and upsetting. I get angry when I think about how many times I have been invalidated, undermined or told I am doing it wrong.

Throughout this year I've been slowly learning to listen to my own voice and trust my instinct with things and I've never been happier. It's a good feeling. I've also limited contact with professionals which has really helped. For once I haven't been told over and over that I'm doing it wrong. It's a relief. It is liberating. I finally feel at peace with myself, that I am doing the right thing. I am learning to trust myself, to feel confident in my decisions and life choices.